Celtic Illumination, part 13, Bloody foreigners
The area where you create is known as your workplace, or if you are a bloody foreigner, a work station. The room in which you work is known as your workplace or shed. So the subject what I would like to approach next is safety in the workplace. You are dealing with Vinamold at 160c, boiling wax, live flames, Butane gas, cocaine and alcohol. The more experienced apprentice master candle makers among you will be dealing with all these dangerous products, and all at the same time, while wearing six inch stilettoes.
Being the Ninja’s of the manufacturing world, health and safety has no place in our workplaces. Health and safety is for soldiers in the army or formula one drivers, health and safety has no place in the life of a master candle maker. We laugh in the face of danger and it is that determination, that thick headedness that allows our creative processes to flourish. Remember, great sailors do not learn on a calm sea.
Alexander Fleming would never have discovered penicillin if health and safety had their way, Mount Everest would never have been conquered by an Irishman if health and safety had their way. And before any of you start arguing that some fellow called Hillary and his servant Tenzing were the first to conquer Everest who do you think built the fecking road for Hillary to walk up? Anyway, you don’t really think that a fellow with a girl’s name was first up a big mountain, now do you?
You may say that how do I know such things? Where is the proof that an Irishman was the first person to conquer Everest? Well, the time has come to reveal that my master was that very Irishman who conquered Everest. It was during his descent, when he was putting out a line of cones for Hillary to follow that he caught a dose of snow blindness. Hillary thought that because my master couldn’t read the newspapers that he would claim to be first and as they say in Warrenpoint, the rest is history.